Aloha, lets start the day with a topic I know and love: why health care costs are so high! Do physicians run assembly line practices?
Kevin walked into a doctors office and the desk clerk asked him what he had. Kevin said, “shingles!” So she wrote down his name, address and medical insurance number and told him to have a seat. Fifteen minutes later a nurse’s aide came out and asked Kevin what he had. “Shingles,” he responded. So she took his height, weight, a complete medical history and put him in an exam room. A half-hour later, another nurse came in, gave Kevin a blood test, took his blood pressure, did an EKG and told him to strip to his underwear and wait for the doctor. An hour later, the doctor came in, found Kevin sitting patiently in his underwear and asked Kevin what he had. Kevin says, “Shingles!” The doctor looked at his chest and asked, “Where?” Kevin said, “Outside on my truck! Where do you want me to unload ‘em?”
A sign in an orthopedist (bone specialist) office: The Little Toe: Designed specifically to geo-locate furniture in poorly lighted rooms … A sign outside a Popeye’s Chicken chain: Food for thought: What if we fried our chicken in olive oil? … Note left by a father for his young son: “Dear Billy, I tried to come in and get your tooth but there were so many toys on your floor, I tripped and fell. I am going to come back tonight. Please make sure your room is clean so I won’t hurt myself again!” … And the best: A sign outside a marriage counselor’s office: “Husbands are the best people to share our secrets with. They’ll never tell anyone because they aren’t even listening!“ Yep, that counselor was a very busy one!
A young boy to his father: “Dad, I think the Smiths next door are angry at us!” “Why is that?” “They’re probably mad because our dog can retrieve the newspaper and their’s can’t.” “How could you possibly know that? We don’t even subscribe to the newspaper!” “Yeah, that’s probably got something to do with it too!”
Let’s not forget some of the most important people in our lives! … Teacher: “George Washington not only chopped down his father’s cherry tree, but also admitted doing it! Now, do you know why his father didn’t punish him?” One student: “Because George still had the axe in his hand!”
Time to close with one that is “too close to home” … Two older men are talking. One says to the other, “We had dinner the other night at a really great restaurant!” The other man says, “What was the name of the restaurant?” The first man says, “What is that flower called, the one with the really nice scent?” “A rose?” First guy turns to his wife and says, “Rose, what was the name of the restaurant where we ate the other night?” Ah yes, friends, aging is a plus!
Aloha, be well … a hui hou.