I’m retired now, time to relax … yeah, right!
I do 10 times more work now than when I was working. After working all day did I really come home and mow the lawn, trim the trees, fix the car, clean the house, and fix the faucet in the 1 hour before dinner?
When you have nothing to do, work comes looking for you.
Ah retirement: the end of the rainbow, when you lay your burden down and swing in the hammock all day. You coulda fooled me.
It’s my golden years but who thought gold could rust. No doubt about it, I’m slowing down. I once climbed Maunakea, surfed Sunset and hitchhiked across the country. Now it’s a big deal to walk to the mailbox.
Walking through Walmart and Safeway is a double marathon. One more store it turns into the Ironman. But there are older guys and ladies who really do the Ironman? They have to be aliens from a planet without Big Macs and Lazy Boy chairs. They are totally amazing. Everytime I think of an 80-year-old running 26 miles in the hot sun I have to have a beer.
But who’s in a hurry? The other day on Alii Drive I was stuck in traffic, cars slowed to a crawl. Where once I’d cuss and moan, I realized that going slow let me notice every tree and flower, every cute lady jogging, and really check out the waves. Traffic jams let you see the sights, enjoy them.
Oh yea, talking about growing old. From about 50 to 60, unless you’re a Zumba instructor, race-car driver or the most stressful of all, a kindergarten teacher, you drive back and forth to work with glazed eyes just floating along.
But like every worker in America you are secretly waiting for that glorious day when horns will honk and bells will ring and ticker tape will flutter down from above, the day you retire, hallelujah!
Yes folks, at the golden age of 62 after working your whole life they hand you your big reward, a social security check, free money.
At 62, you get a check in the mail for life. Is this a great country or what? Money put in your bank each month, now there’s a reason to live.
There are some practical souls who arrive at the big day of the check and refuse the bucks and keep working. Can you believe it?
They are 62 but if they work a few more years, their check will be a couple bucks more, and at 70 they will have more money. Not so good.
Best to take the money and run because at 62 you have energy to go out and do fun things. At 70 you might get 200 more dollars but you’ll be doddering along and won’t care that much about the money.
Life is fleeting, grab it while you can. Seize the day, go out and live it up!
I’m heading to the Lazy Boy, it’s happy hour. Where’s the remote?
Dennis Gregory writes a bi-monthly column for West Hawaii Today and welcomes your comments at makewavess@yahoo.com.